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Bridesmaid hassles

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Hi girls,

i am in desperate need of your opinions with one of my bridesmaids.. I always go to my H2B & thought maybe I could benefit from your different opinions.

I am getting married in February & obviously asked my closest friends. Well who I thought were my closest. This particular friend I asked prior to getting engaged we would catch up fortnightly & she was always so happy as she has lots to look forward to. It seemed as soon as I got engaged we stopped catching up as much maybe 3 or 4 times in over 6 months. She isn't married or engaged but seems to show me pictures of what she wants at her wedding when we catch up. She seemed to go into a depression even though her life is amazing and I can't help but think its been because I am getting married & she isn't.

When I went shopping for my dress I had told all the BM that I was getting a BA because I hate my boobs & have for 10 years yet when I had the dress that I wanted to buy on she kept saying I don't think you'll need a boob job in that dress & I kept having to explain over & over again that I wasn't getting a BA for the wedding? I caught up with her 3 days prior to my BA & I did not even receive a text message to see how I was going, yet all my other BM at least flicked me a text to see how I was doing.

im not sure if I'm being a bridezilla or I have a reason to be confused & concerned. I would love to hear your opinions.. Actually I think I need to hear them! I can't help but think she doesn't really have much interest in my life at all!

TIA xx

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Oh my god it sounds like you're in a VERY similar position to me. At least to position I was in anyway. She has since told me she will be overseas on our wedding day... Awesome. I guess it's a blessing in disguise, I don't want someone like that to be my bridesmaid! You're not being bridezilla. You want people who care about you and care about helping make your wedding day perfect. I haven't mentioned my situation to anyone (not even my other bridesmaids) either and my poor fiance is probably sick of hearing about it! Haha. Now I need to find a fourth bridesmaid to take her place who won't stuff me around! If she keeps this up will you drop her as a bridesmaid or grin and bare it? What date in Feb are you getting married? I'm getting married in Feb too! xx

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Weddings can bring out the ugliness in some people. If you value the friendship, I would be upfront with her and ask her if anything is going on, you feel that she isn't happy for you etc. If you don't want the drama and her friendship won't be a loss, cut her from the wedding.

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Hi babe,

I'm sorry to hear you're going through this :( bridesmaids are hard work - they are the cause of so much stress. At my wedding my chief bridesmaid pulled out three weeks before the big day because she couldn't handle the attention being on her in that position - yup! Umm wtf I'm the bride! Anyway we aren't friends anymore and that marriage didn't last. I ended up happily remarried but we didn't have bridal parties because of all the dramas they bring - never again!

it sounds like your friend is the type to really be there for you when your life is either crap or not better than what she perceives hers to be but then when yours is great she isn't there for you. Sounds like she's a bit jealous to me. Hopefully she can suck it up and be a true friend for you as this is something you don't need to be dealing with before your big event and in your recovery xx I hope your recovery is going well and so are your wedding plans xxx

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Hi indie,

no way! She pulled out 3 weeks before!?! That's sooo crappy. I am feeling a bit stupid for choosing her & have been feeling like I've made the wrong decision pretty early in the piece. Woman's instinct is not to be messed with right? I've put it to her does she really want to be a part of it & it's been a few days now so hopefully she decides what's best for both of us :)

thank you so much for your opinions I seriously am needing it :)

recovery is going so well, love my new assets x

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Weddings are meant to be a celebration about your love for each other not a big stress and drama... But it generally seems like that is what happens when planning it all... At the end of the day it is YOUR day and people often forget that.

Shes probably just jealous you have big boobs and are getting married and she has a flat chest and is single... (lol) I would just shower her with compliments and attention... If she hasnt texted you - that in no way means you cant text her... Give her an update on the boobs and ask if everything is ok coz you havent spoken to her... Tell her you missing your catch ups and schedule one in... If you dont like that shes being distant make the effort to reach out... Try not to talk about Weddings and focus on other stuff if you can.

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